I have been wanting to tell this story for a long time but I haven’t been in my right mind for 13 months (more on THAT in future posts, stay tuned!) What I’m about to tell you actually took place almost 2 years ago but I was waiting for the perfect time to share it and you know what I realized? There is no perfect time for anything when I am in my will. Perfect timing is God’s timing and the Holy Spirit is telling me NOW is the time. So here we go!
It was July, 2020 and our world was being attacked by COVID-19; and I was also being attacked spiritually. I mean, we were quarantined – no doubt I wasn’t the only one. For me, I was struggling with my anger & patience issues with my daughters and once again, questioning my cannabis use; which always means I have gone astray in my faith.
So I decided to quit cannabis AND sugar at the same time. My friend suggest a book called “The 40 Day Sugar Fast” written by Wendy Speake, so I bought it and dived WAY in immediately. On Day 4, another friend in AA suggested I join an online speaker meeting that she said, and I quote, “this woman’s story is going to change your life!” Funny because my friend who suggested the sugar fast said the same thing. Coincidence? Nope. Keep reading.
So I went to the meeting and was sobbing by the end of it. I wanted to smoke so bad and so I did, I broke my cannabis fast. It was all or nothing for me. I wanted to keep smoking but not if God didn’t want me to. I wanted to continue using cannabis but not if it was going to get in the way of my usefulness for Him. I went to bed crying and praying…begging…for God to take the desire to smoke away or allow me to use it responsibly. Begging Him to help me show up as a better mom to my daughters during such fragile, formative years. And wouldn’t you know…
…I literally woke up feeling totally different. Like, a massive weight had been lifted. My entire attitude and outlook on life had changed and so had my behaviors towards my girls, literally overnight. That same evening, the 3 of us were drawing on the living room floor, listening to a meditation music station on Alexa. Second song into the playlist, I say, “this song is beautiful, I wonder what it’s called…Alexa…what’s the name of this song?”
” The name of this song is “Children” by….”
We continue drawing and the next song plays and I love that one too, so I ask Alexa again what the name of the song is.
“The name of this song is “A New Beginning” by…..”
My jaw drops. I’m like “uhhh, hello God!” We keep drawing. 3rd song starts playing.
“Alexa, what’s the name of this song?”
“The name of this song is “With Utmost Calm by…”
And there it was. Confirmation. God heard my prayers the night before. There was no doubt in my mind.
Not only did God hear my prayers, He listened.
Not only did He listen, He answered.
I had woken up that day feeling like a new woman and went to bed that night a new mom for my girls.
Coincidence? Luck? Serendipitous?
Not in God’s kingdom.
That was a God Shot.
I can’t make this “shtuff” up!
#morewillberevealed
P.S. I DID complete the “The 40 Day Sugar Fast” book with a few cheat treats and still, the book totally changed my life. My friend was right. Of course she was. God had brought her back into my life for a reason. Lots of reasons, as it turns out. I can’t help it, I gotta say it again…
…more…will…be…revealed.
My Recovery Revealed 